Current (ly) Issue

Last week been tough,

Now, I mean today, I feel great... :)

I feel confident about today, we have this compliance audit something but and we already prepared all the needed documents, so, finger crossed we could get great audit result.

anyway,

These days I've been visiting this website Mommiesdaily , and found some insightful writings. Not only about pregnancy and babies but some very touching personal stories. There were story about being single parent, going through divorce and even losing a husband. well.. it brought my tears..huhuhu...it amazing how people survive such thing, being tough and continue living into the fullest..Im thankful that through their bravery I could add my perspective about life..

I learned that Life always bring unexpected surprises, the good and the bad, and we have to act accordingly, respect whatever happen as the process of our journey in this world..

I learned that happiness doesnt always stay, it may disappear or fade away with time, and we have to accept that as thing that make us stronger..

I learned that we cant hold our beloved people or precious belongings forever..for one day they may being substracted from our life calculation, but we still have to continue counting.. :)

So, Let live this moment. Being grateful for so many blessings God gave us until today...

My precious thing today is..My husband... :)

Dear baby,

I love you dearly so berry berry much

You add what wasnt exist in my life

Happiness, laughter, tears, gratitude..

you are the monster bear I can hug when I am tired and weary

may you always strong and healthy..

be a great husband and daddy..

Dew drops

Iam about to cry now..

the pressure at the office today was tough, should deal with keep-coming-and surprising-matters for the whole day. Boost my stress level to maximum and I almost explode.

And in this tiring moment,

sometimes we just dont have choice except for being brave and...alone.

I've been walking through sharp corals..

touched by burning flame..

sunk in the deepest sea..

I've been through many things

holding on my own

I can keep doing it....and keep doing it..

Birthing Plan

Now,

Baby bree already have a regular kicking schedule...in the morning after breakfast and at night before sleep. Usually before sleep me or her daddy will tell her a story, either from story book or Istoryapps and other downloads using tab.

While I prefer more varied folklore/tale from all over the world version, daddy prefer more local and Islamic one. Last time daddy tell story about Noah prophet, but like usual, daddy part the story into several nights (haha, lazy daddy). Aubrey kicking frantically, exciting. and after the story finish, she get calmer. and we all went to sleep.

Btw, talking about my pregnancy, even tough it is too early to decide but I plan to give birth normal. Except, if here's medical condition that make me go with C-section option. well, Im fine with both, but I prefer normal. :)

And after give birth, I want to practice IMD (inisiasi menyusui dini) for my baby, and she will be room in with me for 3x24 hours.

WHy Normal?

I just find it is a natural way to give birth, it may scary and the pain looks tough (yeah, I also have that kind of fear and nervousness, hiks2), but I believe this experience will become an eye opener for every woman to cherish life even more, love our mom even more and see world differently..whoaa.

Why IMD?

IMD is super important to create intial bonding with our baby, beside, technically it will be breast feed lesson for the baby where she will learn to find her mom's breast and nipple, by herself (aww, good luck ya bree..hihi).

for more info about IMD, go check here

Why Room in?

For me, Room in is a MUST! I have several reasons:

1. I want to make sure I can breast feed her along our stay at the hospital

2. I want to make sure there will be NONE nurse/midwife give formula milk without my consent (or I will Sue them, for sure!!)

3. Call me paranoia but some baby kidnap cases are happening, so I want my baby to be always under me or my husband's watch.

So far, I've check out one hospital in Cirebon (RS Mitra) which I thought the facilities was great, but they seems to specialize in C-section and I didnt find the service convincing, so, another Hospital hunting these weekend, wish me luck mommiees... :)

Hello Mommies...

I am 22 weeks pregnant now, feel so much happier, stronger and better in so many ways.at first, I found pregnancy is hard, more because of the fatigue, sickness and nausea. But that only last in the first trimester, which now already passed. Alhamdulillah.

In my early pregnancy, I also find how shallow was my knowledge on being pregnant and baby related information, I feel sooo lack of knowledge. But Alhamdulillah (again) I work in a nutrition company whereso many infos and so many more experienced people are surround me.

I catch up step by step until now I feel confident about my pregnancy.

And to help new moms out there, here are some tips that you might found useful :

1. Pregnancy test

After married, both you and your husband sure should improve your diet into more healthy and complete in nutrition. The nutrition from your food intake will impact on your sperm and ovum quality.  And, even before pregnant you will need consistent folic acid for your future baby to physically grow healthy. what you eat today will make the health quality of your baby tomorrow.

If you don't use contraception, try to do pregnancy test 7 days after having sex. Do the test in the morning where HCG level is the highest. If you are not sure with the first result, do another test in the next morning and go to gynecologist for further check.

2. Hurraay,...Iam Pregnant
Congraaats, dont be panick!. Most first timer must have so many things pop in their head, worried, happy, afraid, etc those mix feeling. hehe. First, calm your self,drink some water, sit in for a while while swallowing the information. Second, be happy and share the news to your loved one.---> be creative, make a cute picture/ bow tie your test result, etc. :)

3. Nutrition intake
Super duper important to know that, by being pregnant meaning your calorie needs is increasing by 300gr. Therefore, you have to eat more composition of protein, carbohydrate and fat. Add your fruit and veggie consumption, especially those contain folic acid like orange, banana, spinach and avocado. why? lack of folic acid in early pregnancy will impact your baby spinal cord and brain development, the baby might born with spina bifida and anenchepaly.

4. Go Visit your Gynecologist
Easy, ask your experienced friends for recommendation. Or here how I did it, I pick several closest hospital to my home, google the doctor list and check the doctor schedule. Ohya, there are also so many moms who recommend their doctor in so many forum, so google surely will help you pick your obgyn. Now, I my self visiting three gynecologist, One regular in Asri hospital (dr. Satrio), another in YPK Mandiri (dr. Yusfa) and at Kimia (dr. Wibowo Noroyono---> Prominent Gynecologist in Indonesia recommend by a friend :)).
Actually, dr. Bowo is the most detail and thorough doctor, but his place is far and he is super duper busy. So, I choose dr. Satrio because he is having high availability in Asri and Asri is just 5 min away from my home. Huehehe. While dr. Yusfa in YPK is very helping for second opinion. He is quite detail also.
Btw, at the early pregnancy  the gyn will give you vitamin, mostly folic acid, seeing how important it is, dont forget to consume it EVERYDAY!. :p

5. Read Read Read
Along the pregnancy, there will be many question about this and that, either regarding the symptomp we have or other trivial thoughts. To prepare your self, you can visit below websites for their insightful information :

1. My pregnancy bible here (hahaha)
at babycenter.com, we can log in as member and we will have weekly update on our baby development through email (yaay, trust me everytime I get the email, it was a lovely reminder). Beside, they also have complete infos and cool baby apps, this website does help a lot.

2. This is the local version
Here, we can find most information in bahasa Indonesia and more fits for Indonesian mom, albeit
the info is actually universal and just as helpful. :) ps: they have Indonesian baby name list...

3. 'What to expect when you're expecting' book
here is the free download version what to expect

As starter, those 3 web and book will be very helpful. Trust me.. :)


Last, congrats new mom..
Be happy always and enjoy your pregnancy...
Now, I gotta check lamaze class in several place..
See you...

The longing of Everything

It is humane to long for something, beyond the limit of tangible things. One person could long for a fancy car, yummy dinner, lovely shoes or latest designer handbags. Whilst, others may long for something more abstract like happiness, ease or love.

There is nothing right or wrong on that, the most important thing is to always long for what is truly important in our life, which of course to want a thing meaning to pick based on priority. For me, my utmost priority is my baby.

She's my everything. All my hard work, my plan in the near future, now circulate around her. Again, I am very grateful to be a mother soon. I've plan many things for her, her essential needs list (newborn cloths, diapers, travel bag, etc) into her 'entertainment' list (pillow books, story books, lullaby apps), everything will be for her.

Now, Every time I back home and feel tired or exhausted, I remember my baby and somehow she makes me feel better. :)

I love every kick, every movement, every hard time we pass through together.
I already fall deeply in love with her....my Aubrey baby... ;*.

THE WEDDING

I know its been 5 months since my wedding, and am already pregnant now..haha. Kinda very late, but, I never really have the chance to post any pic on the day, so, here it is...my pics at Akad nikah or wedding vow. Marrying the guy I love and wearing those pretty dress, It was a great feeling. :)

ps: due to bad connection I'll share my reception pic later..

enjoy... :)

with my family

With our beloved parents

Tacky pose, but pretty..hehe

19 weeks and counting

My baby is now 19 weeks, start to grow hair and sensory development is exploding! wohoo.

I get the update of my baby every week from here , an every time I receive the update email, Im happy. Now, start to feel the kicking and slight movement, go dancing baby!.

Anyway, let briefly flash back into my early pregnancy, how do I found out that Im pregnant?

Well, I dont really sure but it was my intuition to buy pregnancy test after passing a day from my regular period schedule. Week before knowing that Iam pregnant, I was physically challenged. There was a trip to Bromo mountain (hiking, jeep riding, etc), and then two days strolled around Jakarta accompanying my lil sisters who happened to visit me on their holiday (tiring malls hopping and walking), and the jackpot was doing CFD (car free day) on weekend, walking from monas all the way long to Sudirman. Haaah.

And it appears I already pregnant. My baby must be a future athlete. Strong strong kid. Mommy cant wait to meet you kiddooo...kiss kiss.

HI circle with my 2 weeks old baby

Daddy with His proud jersey

The love of my life

When I was little,

When my parents are not around,

There was a very kind angel who took care of me

brought me sweets, snacks and accompany me everyday.

She bought me my favorite apple and always stroke my back before I sleep

She is my lovely person

My grandmother....

I love her so very very much....

I cant wait for Idul adha and meet her, I wanna hug her... :) :)

Nenek Kamila

My three little sisters,

They are my sunshine, three different characters that add the color of my life.

I love them dearly and I hope they will grow into their best.



And Last, Ofcourse...My Lovely Husband...The big big big big Love in my life



Wish list

These days, Thing that make me happy is thinking about buying some essential stuffs to welcome my baby.One of the most important thing I imagine will be , a stroller!. I've been browse and read so many reviews, stumble upon Oh-so-expensive strollers (that will cost me 600-800 of dollars) into the very cheap one but looks not convincing type.

Thanks God, I finally stumble upon Kindercube.com website and found this one fancy brand, Cosatto!. Their stroller Not only affordable (+-200 $) but also come with super fun design! I will definitely buy This. Yaaay.

btw, I also check the Cosatto official website  here , too bad their new awesome stroller has not yet available in Indonesia. So I should go with this lil pip squeak..hehe.

arrgh, cant wait the time I am allowed to start buying my baby's stuffs.

Cosatto swift supa lite stroller

Home?

It's funny how you miss and hate home at the same time.
Place that raise us up but also dragged us down.
Too many negativity, too many ugly things now.

I dont want to go back home.

Positive thing is, now lets revisit every plan,
redirecting life, choose the best way to go.

Rest In Peace Mbah Uti...

This morning I had a quite shocking news.

My very close neighbor, who we called Mbah Uti has passed away.

I am sad, all I can do was send her my prayer.She is a very kindhearted woman. She and her husband were our closest neighbor.

They both a very lovely couple, kind and just filled with so much love.

Mbah Kakung must be broken and sad, but I believe He is a strong man.

They are my 'widyawati and Sophan sophian' version...

Mbah and Mbah Kakung was always there, helping out my family in our difficult times (when my sister was acting frantically crazy). When we were little, Mbah Uti usually end us food, real home-cooking food especially on Lebaran. Her cooking was great, my whole family loved it.

It was when 'Lamaran' I see her as beatiful and healthy as usual, help my mom with the preparation. She was always involve and helpful. But then not long after that, she get sick, made her unable to walk. It was my greatest regret unable to see her for the last time in Lebaran. I suppose to come and ask my apologize and my gratitude.

Now she is Gone, I believe Allah will bring her into the bestest place. She is one of few people who her kindness and love were so strong everyone could feel it. Genuinely kind and truly beautiful person.

We love you mbah, May Allah lead your way to heaven. amiiiin.

Home

If I have the chance to choose my future home,

It will be a small bamboo home in the middle of vegetables field.

Where I can hear birds chirping and river flowing.

I will grow my own tomatoes, chili and cassava.

My children will go to nearby school and learn qoran and Islam in near madrasah. I will teach them values, the importance to be an honest, brave, clever person.They will grow with lack of TV but extensive Internet reading.

They will speak Indonesian, English and one other language they love to learn.They will live humble and be ambitious only for good cause...

My children will live to lead those who need direction, help those who need support.

Grateful

Alhamdulillah,

Iam very grateful for what I have now
My husband
My baby
My tiny living place
My precious things....

last weekend, we went to the mall and watched premium rush. well, it appears the title didnt go along with the movie, it's fun it's fresh but not that 'premium rush'. :).

After the movie, we stroll around Debenhams and found one very me leather wallet. so I bought it.. hehe. For real leather, the discount price was very valueable..

And, it is just so true, the more time you spend in that place, the more you buy..so somehow, I also manage to find just the perfect dress for this saturday event. The dress truly accentuated my 16 weeks pregnant belly and look just pretty on me. :)

Therefore, I am a happy person.

Life.File.Efil

I feel exhausted
Physically and emotionally
I want something that more laid back
something more me


Maybe it is because everything at work are so uptight,
the deadline, the schedule... everything.
I feel kinda overwhelm..


But, it is a process. Of me growing, taking chances and doing life
for deep in my heart, I hope one day I will be able to change direction
going into place that I really want, do things I am really cool at..

I miss those corridor, when I can just walk passing through shelves of book,
type my laptop like crazy, browse journals like eating cookies..
being truly fascinated by science..
listen to words I never hear
See miracles I never imagine
And I feel burst of amazement...

Being pregnant

It is a nice thing knowing that I will have a small tiny baby, my own baby.

so Glad, buut, to be honest pregnancy is not an easy thing (atleast for me).

I've just past my 1st trimester and it went like super roller coaster.

The nausea the constant fatigue and sickness. argh.

Alhamdulillah I manage to get through it, with amazing support from my lovely husband.

Now, my baby is 15 weeks old, just having his/her first fingerprints and start to recognize

light. Havent experiencing any kicking yet but hopefully soon she/he shows some moves. Yes baby, dance as you like.... :)

anyway, Iam also super glad that I work in nutrition company, therefore I have quite

well rounded knowledge regarding pregnancy and baby's nutrition related. Really hope

the next 6 months will run smooth, am super healthy and the delivery process will be

just easy....amiin.

Aaand, my baby will not be bond to colour, boy or girl she/he is, any colour will be

freely use to add the cuteness. why?. who knows my baby is a gothic baby girls?, she will

look prettier wearing dark brown/black/grey..Oor..what if He is a cheerful baby boy?

isnt occasional pink or orange will be very cute?.

Hehe.

How to daddy?

Dear Bree...

If you ask me, who's daddy?

Daddy is the most lovely and kind man in our life,
He works hard for us
He gives us the best
and He loves us like crazy....krah..zeee!!!!

He is the person who will wake up at night to change your diapers (ya, mommy probably sleeping,hehe)
He is the person who will hold you when you cry
He is the person who will kiss you every day every time

and

He is the person who will buy you your first ice cream,
your cute baby clothes
your edgy stroller
your tiny padded shoes

so, bree
when you grown up
you have to love daddy with all your heart
Respect him, listen to what he says and be a good kid...

Dear Aubrey,...

Dear aubrey,

love is a wonderful things that could always surprisingly expand in a beautiful way.
Yesterday I realized that you're here (oh I almost cry writing this)
It was a mix feeling of shock, happiness and of course fear bloom in my heart.
Next days and months might not be easy, And I might not know everything nor get everytyhing come in perfection..

but, we can do it bree....sure we can do it...


we can be a great team, sure we do...


Bree,

I expect nothing but you to be the most clever, brave, honest , cool and kind person ever...




-love, mommy.-

Gratitude

life been so kind and so nice.
Iam so grateful having what I have now, seriously, cant thank enough...
Married, slightly changed my life rythem
I woke up earlier, sleep earlier
and the best part is
I have the chance to share this with the person I love.

and I cook
yadda yadda, I love cooking regardless the taste of my cooking..haha

counting minutes....

Now, two days left before my wedding vow (akad nikah).
these past months, down the path to marriage, was surely no easy.
there are moments when I broke down and kinda lil bit depressed.

because doing this, Im not without fear...
because planning this, I have to keep my eyes carefully observe and ear attentively listen..
If there's something I consider I cant take in the marriage, I'll put it on hold.

But, he did try his best.
staying there even when I act so vulnerable and mean
he seems so sure and strong willed

and it was him who make me see things differently
who get me pass through the storm and thunder
and gave me such wonderful small tiny place to live

I love him dearly...

Would you be......

6 years ago

the first time

He ask me to be his girl

this song was wrapped in a CD

and yes

the lyrics explain everything

:)

-Now-

Look around,  I was once so sure about what I want, then my Thought is rumbling..

I used to wish to hike the highest mountain, dive into the deepest sea.

Now, I dont see those as interesting as before.

Perhaps It is true that when you grown up, values are shifting.

No longer burning ambition, but the long to have just a lovely calm days.

Elevator shock

27.04.12

I was in an elevator.
suddenly, the electricity shut dwon
Elevator stopped, stuck and create a gentle shake which scared the hell out of me.
Never thought that I will have such experience, yet it was very much an eye opener.
I was with another 4 persons who are as scared as I am. other 3 were pretend to act cool, one man totally lost his mind and freaked out like a granny (hehe).


But we managed to stay calm.
Press the emergency button and talk with elevator guy.
10 minutes of wait.....
with crazy thought that the levator will plummet down
I was even think whether I will die or not.
anyway
after 10 minutes...
the elevator finally move...

when I realize we're trapped...

am gonna die???

When the elevator finally open

Aaarrggg so relieveed

When finally step out of that damned elevator

 

walk like A boss!!



Goal!!

Joined the squad

lucky number eight

Play with the team

we're RED team

Didnt win, but had so much fun! I love chasing and running and running and kickin some a**! hehe

One screw must be missing

One said that,
a personality build from the family
so either your family is utterly disfunctional
or you must be badly lonely.

still in wonder though, why this little birdie get so scary and upset.
she's ranting and yielding and intimidating other.
you are actually pretty but you paint your face beast.

if you able to be kind, then be kind.

kindess is a virtue that stays...shown to everyone regardless class and education.
kindness should be universal and consistent.

If  kindness come and go, so either it is fake or you  are simply border line.

dear, that red angry face and explosive words is not pretty at all,
nor they are end up functional
but an ear dont want to listen wont listen.
problem is,
you lit the fire
I burnt

I react badly to burnt wound,
but since Iam the normal one here,
I'll stay be your friend
but
not that kind of friend who hugs, greet or smile.
I'll be more like neutral.

my suggestion:
get real friends and live with real family. just, get a life!.

Perjalanan

Kemarin,
lagi-lagi aku sendiri melakukan perjalanan yang harus aku jalani
bertemu dengan orang-orang baru yang entah kenapa membuatku kembali bersemangat
mereka adalah alasan baru untukku tetap tinggal
kadang kita memang mebutuhkan orang lain untuk bertahan didalam situasi tertentu
saat ini,
aku merasa pekerjaan ini adalah unfinished business yang harus aku selsaikan, sampai aku tiba di satu titik dimana aku merasa telah melakukan sesuatu.

hari ini,
aku kembali larut dalam ritual minum kopi di pagi hari.
tanpa sarapan, tanpa apapun sebagai pengisi perut. hanya udara pagi dan debu2 kendaraan yang kulewati.
aku merasa lebih tenang, lebih cool. entah kenapa.

tetap kelimpungan melihat tumpukan kertas yang harus kuperiksa satu per satu,
email yang harus kubaca dengan teliti dan kubalas kembali.
tulisan-tulisan rapih sisa kemarin berisi hal-hal yang harus kukerjakan hari ini.
ah, aku suka note book baruku.

saat ini,
bolak-balik membuka email, membuat excel, membaca dokumen.
sedikit pusing.
kemudian kulenyapkan segala pusing itu, kubuka deviantart, menikmati kreatifitas yang begitu menarik.
sedap.
sedikit iri.
ah, seandainya aku bisa flash atau corel atau sejenis itu..
pasti senang sekali bisa menterjemahkan warna-warni dikepalaku kedalam visual image yang quirky.

Teman: Cangkir kopi + buku catatan + permen impact

OVLE

-End of Rainbow-

And now… I promise you…

That I will so… so close to you…

Like you want me too…

Like I want it too…

And now… I think I’m in love with you…

And…this scenes…got my eyes on you…

For the first time.. yee for the first time…

Reff:

And now… I’ll pick up the star for you…

If you love me too…if you love me too…

I know… I’ll fly you to the sky over the seven sky…

If you love me too …

And now… don’t know what to do…

You got me drown so deep into…

Into you… so deep into you…

Reff:
And now… I’ll pick up the star for you…
If you love me too…if you love me too…
I know… I’ll fly you to the sky till the end of the raindow
End of the rainbow…

Little by little pass your life embrace your heart…

Light my love melt into your soul….

Into your soul…yeahhh

That my love that your life embrace your heart…

melt into your soul…

Happy (Party + Family time)

Simply put, I am feeling happy...these days...

Alhamdulillah...

Last two weeks been uber crazy, very hectic, very tiring..work and preparing national meeting..but it was so worth since the meting went very well.. and my team won the booth contest! yaaay!!

besides, It appears that I love to dance, dj, loud music and jumping like crazy..I love shufflin!

after those partying time, the week wrapped up in a beautiful moment which I enjoyed very much, getting busy preparing the plan, I might be tired but every time I get home and meet my family I feel some kind of comfort that make me feel easy. Iam happy that one by one the check list is done, getting closer to the day and Oh I am so excited...

Am I afraid? Nope, Im so glad that I can scream loud that I aint afraid..

Trouble and challenges may come , but baby as long as I have you beside me, we'll be alright...  :)

I love to think that we are actually off guard yet stupid and brave enough just to go with it and face everything together..Its us, two against the world....awwww....xoxo

retro enough?! the gala dinner

70's enough? the dance team

My cherry belle costume adn yeah we did the cherry belle dance in front of everyone...lol

two weirdos about to dance like crazy

Gender neutral

Read an article about parent who give their child a freedom to wear girl and boy clothes in the hope to raise the child in gender-neutral environment. my question is, is there any?. the construction of gender been exist for so long it root in our social environment, almost become something that undeniably important. why? because we live and breath those construct every day, it have a big impact on who we are. If, the stereotype of gender considered as something that bring negative impact, than lets make a change. gender is not a fix definition, we have room for positive changes throughout the era. don't see it as something that restricting, rather, see it as a way of liberating. That is why the amazing story of women movement are exist, because they make a change. reconstruct the very mean of gender it self.

Allowing children to wear any color they want. to let them choose any toys they interested in. to give them the idea of being whatever they want.

One step further

Alhamdulillah, after 12 months of learning, finally I finished my MT program, graduate with satisfying remark (huehehehe). I still have room for improvement though, endurance and consistency. Get bored easily and fluctuating in terms of performance. But, over all  I done my part fine.

My next job will be even more complicated and tough, rawr! Kinda feel like escaping from lion's mouth and get into dinosaurs jaw!. Since this dinosaurs jaw might taught me a lot, I hope I can out my best and give significant impact on what I am doing. In the mean time, well I should check this bunch of data and email...

see you guys soon....xoxo  :)

-

memento

It feels like you took away one of the (supposedly) very best moment in my life. Create a hole in my heart. Try to forget, try to move on. But every time I look around, heart suddenly feel weak, it's breaking. Well, It is not easy to face thing that I didn't see it coming. But, I am trying.

Anyway, If I look far back, I actually have one I will remember forever in my life. A beautiful night when even the rain drops were beaming. the only night I felt so whimsical. Talked like silly, stupid giggling and burst of laugh. Pure and naive. I'll hold onto that memory forever since it was the best ever happen to me. He. He was the best thing ever come into my heart. none beat it. just him. 23rd nov.

:)

quick up date

Lately, work went crazy.

I develop worrying habit : left the office at 21.00 Pm everyday. I believe in hard work, but I am afraid this work hour routine will do me no good in the future. Well, hopefully, after next two weeks (which I predict will be  no room to breathe) everything run back to normal. normal meaning home by 17.00 Pm.

Btw, lately (perhaps due to exhaustion) I become very sensitive and easily explode. I find many thing as stressing and painful. So many time, I just want to escape and run and free my self from this plan. I think all i need is the strong support and affection from people around me so that I can survive this. At this point, I even not sure about everything. but once you step your foot in a home it isn't easy to just step back and withdrawn.

Lesson is, it takes a solid communication to make things work. otherwise, it will be another flying saucer competition in the house.haha. funny thing is, I will go into an institution that ( Iam afraid) I don't fully believe. I dont have any jovial example of how this institution gives true happiness for anyone in it. all I have are the dysfunctional almost crazy one. so, yeah. idk. I simple want it good, and will try my best to have a good one.

The Old tradition

I wasnt aware of the old tradition in my own family, it's been hold for generation but..I just didnt know. Now, my relatives are questioning me this and that, they seem upset I did thing carelessly without careful considerations and proper discussion with the big family. Now, I feel like I did something bad.

:(

I thought I wont be so trapped in this 'old' perception of how things work, but, my idea of simplicity seems fail to satisfy my big family expectation. they expect more than me. well, I never thought it will be this serious, that everything should be done based on old wisdom and my movement was perceived as inappropriate and not respectful. pfiiuh.

Weird guy

I have someone at the office who made weird and very not funny joke it almost annoying. He seems like lost an important brain part that made the definition of 'joke'. I'm not being mean, I am being kind to explain. haha. What he did that he might think as something funny is actually a thing that make other people, especially me, get annoyed. so, yeah..welcome to the mysterious way of how brain is working.

joke is:

Something said or done to evoke laughter or amusement, especially an amusing story with a punch line.

The fun mall strolling

Last weekend I was in a challenging journey to find the fine and pretty batik for attending my friend wedding. I went to Thamrin city with Acit and Titi, two mates from office who are having a crazy craving over batik. I plan to just window shopping or pick one that I really love. Acit decided to bought four batik with mostly vibrant colors while Titi bought two with more tone down colors and I choose one nude almost peach Kain.

Thamrin city is the heaven for any shopper because this is truly a huge one stop shopping mall where we can find almost everything with proper price. Besides, we still can get the excitement of bargaining the price which usually reduced into 5-10%. How awesome is that?.

so, the next day, I went there again with my boyfriend, we were in the quest to find sarimbit batik ( couple batik ) for our Kondangan (attending wedding) routine . Before search for the batik, we went to the food court and I found this look-like Japanese slash Korean stall who sells ramen and sushi. I ordered Combo package which consist of jyouku ramen + kimchi + kimbap + ocha for only 3.5 USD. Taste really yum the hot and spicy sensation blend perfectly in the beef broth and it melted in my mouth. And it was very cheap, compare to the similar ramen + kimchi + ocha in Urban kitchen which cost me 9USD.

anyway, after hop from one store into another, me and my boyfriend pick this calm green sarimbit to bring home. I really love its bright and outstanding color (compare to other mostly brown color batik) , I cant wait to bring it to my mom's tailor and wear it soon. yay. yay.

the fire dragon

Based on Chinese calendar, this year will be the year of dragon. My sign is dragon, fire dragon. rawwr. So, Im feeling optimistic about this year. It might sound very superstitious but I just love to think that I'll rule this year. haha. I have quiet big plan this year, from my personal goal, career, and social life. A lot thing I should do, a lot thing to achieve. I want to call this year as the year when I finally must learn about discipline, commitment and persistence for my plan are so important I dont take any failure. 

what's important for me this year is, I want to free my self from daily worries and ongoing anxiety about life. I want to live happily like there's no bind  into my creativity. I want to be super versatile and translate burst of ideas into something real. No longer talking but start to walk the talk. Yep, that what this year about, real action in every aspect of my dream, hope, expectation. This year I should bring my ambition alive.